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How do you find love in your heart for your second child?

AuroraBorealis asked:

I am pregnant with my second girl right now and I love my 1st sooo much that I don’t understand how there will be enough love for the new baby too. Does it take love away from your first and use it for your second? I just don’t know how I can love and provide equal attention to both of my girls.

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13 Responses to 'How do you find love in your heart for your second child?'

MaryJane - January 16th, 2008 at 6:52 pm
you just do. I felt the same way when I was prego and then when I saw my 2nd baby it just clicked. I promise you will then ask How can I love two children so much?
emgee - January 17th, 2008 at 4:39 am
I wouldn’t worry. I went throught the same thing, and the love developed. Maybe not as quickly as with the first, but it came.
momof3 - January 20th, 2008 at 3:25 pm
I hated to admit it but I felt the same way when I was pregnant with #2. The thing is you don’t have a set amount of love in you for children. When the 2nd arrives somehow a whole new love is born too. It is just as much as you felt for your first one and then you wonder how you ever could have doubted what you would feel for this beautiful little person.
Kenyai - January 23rd, 2008 at 1:31 pm
I’m sure as soon as you see your baby girl for the first time, you’ll have a hard time not pouring your attention on her. The real task is to be able to take care of your baby while at the same time being able to spend enough time with your older child. Make sure you do both.
ricardocobar - January 25th, 2008 at 10:39 am
Is part of the miracle when you’re father/mother.. you’ll love your kids each one as a unique one, and every one will be part of your full life. Is amazing!!
Jenny G - January 26th, 2008 at 12:15 pm
I thought the same thing when I was pregnant with my baby girl(10 months old now). I also have a 14 year old son. For some reason you are able to share the love equally with both. I love both of my children soooo much. Congrats too!!!
sanjana - January 27th, 2008 at 5:49 am
U can share ur love between them equally.
just make sure that the elder one should not feel that her parents dont like her ..
Tracey L - January 30th, 2008 at 10:01 am
I am pregnant with my fourth. My oldest is 5. I was worried too especially when everyoen told me I was selfish and they other ones would not get enough attention. That is sooo not true. the kids love playing together and get sick of me. It gives them time to get a way from an adult and be a kid. You will have equal love trust me…
iam1funnychick - January 31st, 2008 at 1:18 pm
I have three children. All I can say is that love is not divided, it’s multiplied.

Equal attention isn’t always possible. At the end of every day, you can’t hope to tally up the minutes and hope it’s equal. Sometimes one child gets more, sometimes the other.

Don’t fret!

Have your first child pick out a baby gift for your second. And buy something that your first really wants so the baby can give a gift to her. I did that with my kids and they still remember that. I guess it meant a lot to them.

Take care!
Becca - February 3rd, 2008 at 5:25 am
stop getting pregnant while you are a teenager. Love yourself first.
tnjsalings - February 5th, 2008 at 5:02 pm
I JUST HAD MY SECOND 4 MONTHS AGO SO I AM STILL NEW TO THIS ALSO. I HAVE FOUND THAT WHEN THE NEW ADDITON IS ASLEEP, SPEND TIME WITH THE OTHER CHILD. THAT WAY SHE DON’T FEEL ABANDONED. WHEN THEY ARE BOTH AWAKE LET THE OLDEST ONE HELP YOU WITH THE NEW CHILD. THIS MAKES HER FEEL IMPORTANT AND LIKE A BIG GIRL. GOOD LUCK!!!
rb42redsuns - February 6th, 2008 at 2:09 am
Love divided is love multiplied. It is also an act of the will. The same hormones that enabled you to bond with your first child will work with all of them.
lorylyn - February 8th, 2008 at 9:27 am
there will, you will love them both for their unique differences. Spend time one on one even if it’s only a few minutes each.