Krystal asked:
My fiancé and I are getting married this summer/fall. I don’t want to get a marriage license. I think that being legally married isn’t as important as the commitment we are making to each other. Is it fraud if I take his name and in social settings we refer to each other as husband and wife, however legally we maintain our single status?
He will actually loose his social security benefits if we get the license. He is considered a disabled adult/ child, because he was disabled at birth. He is in a wheelchair and he depends on that money. Being a disabled adult/ child means that it goes through his father’s social security. Also we have already filled power of attorney papers as well as our wills. Common Law marriage is not longer allowed where we live.
Create a video blog…instantly.
My fiancé and I are getting married this summer/fall. I don’t want to get a marriage license. I think that being legally married isn’t as important as the commitment we are making to each other. Is it fraud if I take his name and in social settings we refer to each other as husband and wife, however legally we maintain our single status?
He will actually loose his social security benefits if we get the license. He is considered a disabled adult/ child, because he was disabled at birth. He is in a wheelchair and he depends on that money. Being a disabled adult/ child means that it goes through his father’s social security. Also we have already filled power of attorney papers as well as our wills. Common Law marriage is not longer allowed where we live.
Create a video blog…instantly.
Best Deal Ads :







Caffeinated Content
a marriage license makes it legal, and the government recognizes your marriage. you can live together, and call each other what you want, but you don’t legally hold the title of husband or wife. i agree that the commitment is the most important thing, but when it comes to power of attorney, or in the event of a medical emergency, they are going to go to a legal spouse first. if you aren’t legally married, then they would seek a parent. there are some benefits with taxes as well. getting the marriage license is no big deal, it doesn’t cost much, but it can be a very important document.
Create a video blog…instantly.
You cannot get married without a licence. If you want to get married in a church or civil servant then a licence must be obtained. If you take his last name etc etc yes it could be considered fraud.
If you don’t want to get married that is up to you, but you can’t have it both ways.. you are either going to become husband or wife or common law spouses. If you want to get married and have the ceremony and all you MUST get a licence..
marriage
A marriage license entitles you to his social security if he dies.I think that’s the main perk about getting a license. Most states don’t recognize common law marriages.
Create a video blog
Well, you get a tax break, and if you are a student you would get more financial aid options and, depending on what state you are in, medical and dental benefits. But really, it would complicate matters even more if you didn’t get the certificate, plus, and this is my own belief but the certificate itself is sympolic for your commitment. What’s the big deal, I would just sign the thing!
marriage
It sounds like in your situation you wouldn’t need one. It is not fraud if you choose to legally change your last name. Anyone can change their name if they go through the right paperwork. Referring to each other as husband and wife in social settings is also acceptable in my book. Like you said, the most important thing is the personal commitment you’re making to each other.
I say, if your ducks are in a row (and it sounds like you’ve taken care of that), then it’s really just a piece of paper. That paper holds no lifetime guarantee, because it’s the two of you that will make your life together work.
Congratulations
Create a video blog
if you guys are concerned about having the loss of his benefits but still wish to “get married” have a commitment ceremony. you will commit to eachother but not be married. however, in most states you will be considered common law married if you start using his last name on any legal documents including bills etc. if you are in a state or province where that is not noticed then yes it would be fraud to do anything such as using a last name without approval by the courts. ex. the license. i would check into the laws in your state. but if you just want to commit you commitment to eachother i would look into a commitment ceremony. its not a marriage per se but it is still special.
another problem you may/will run into is an officient not wanting to perform a marriage ceremony without the license. however, most will perform the commitment for you. thank about it you can still get your cake and eat it too.
either way congrats and may you have a long loving life together
marriage
With the edits that you placed, then the benefits don’t seem to outweight the problems it would bring up.
I would suggest calling up a lawyer who knows about marraige laws and such and ask them. There’s tax stuff involved and all of that, so it would be something only somebody fully qualified to talk about it in your state could answer. It could be that not filing the paperwork would constitute fraud against the disability, and thus you’d get into more trouble than you can afford.
Also, it’s really difficult to change your name without getting legally married. It’s really annoying to change your name AFTER getting legally married, but it’s doable. Otherwise, in most places it costs a lot of money and annoyance.
But legally married doesn’t matter when it comes to calling yourself husband and wife.
Caffeinated Content – Members-Only Content for WordPress
You can refer to each other as husband and wife, but it isn’t legally true. What someone said about medical decisions is true-they will go the the spouse first (not you since it isn’t legally recognized) and the to parents, siblings, on so on…you would have no legal say over him should something happen. How old are you that he is getting disability under his father?
Caffeinated Content – Members-Only Content for WordPress
It is not fraudulent to take his name however legally you will not be married. Do as you please though.
Create a video blog
So this really isn’t about your commitment, but money?
Caffeinated Content
If you use his name, use it in conversation and not for legal matters like say…TAXES! A marriage license makes it legal. You won’t be married w/o a license you’ll be “domestic partners” like same sex couples are
Kansieo.com
Talk to the social security office…. They can tell you if benefits will change and how they will change.. Each case if different..
A marriage liscence makes the marriage legal in the eyes of the law, it gives you certain tax benefits and securities in regards to possible seperation later…
In order to legally take his name you either have to be legally married or change your name legally to reflect the change…
While I will agree that committment is the most inportant thing.. Being legally married under the eyes of the law can also be very important…. For instance if your fiance is hospitalized you can be kept out because in some cases only immediate family is premitted in.. Being unmarried you are not immediate family in the eyes of the law… The same would apply if you were the one hospitalized… You would not be listed as next of kin.. Kin implys legally family and you would not be… If medical decision were needed and your fiance were not able to tell them you should make the choices your opinion would be invalid.. you are not next of kin…
You can refer to yourselves as anything you choose.. Just remember in the eyes of the law you would not be and therefore would not get the legal protections and benefits provided by the law…
Do as you see fit however do your research and learn what will and wil not change for certain by talking to the social security office first…
marriage
I would recommend you have a committment ceremony performed. More couples are choosing this route in addition to lesbian and gay couples. In preparations for your ceremony, you need to specify in advance that you are specifically requesting a committment ceremony. This will avoid an potential conflicts with an officiant who choose to only perform legal weddings with a marriage license.
You will definatetly need to have a good power-of-attorney in place so you can act on his behalf at any given time. When couples are married, usually spouses automatically (not always) are able to act on their spouses behalf, but in your case, you will not be maried. Another draw back is you may not be eligible to inlcude him on employer’s health and life insurance if you are not legally married. You should contact your employer directly to see how this may affect you.
As for titles, you can refer to each other as husband and wife or whatever you want in social settings. No one can dictate how you refer to each socially. You just won’t be able to refer to each other as husband and wife legally. If you want, you can also legally change your last name to his through the court if you so choose.